The Grassy Best

Friday, September 7th, 2007

The Grassy Tradewire (Pt 2: Free-Agency Adds and Rookie Signings)

Now the Additions:

Key Offense and Defense will be provided by newly signed and one-time member of This Is My Bubba (a former powerhouse of the Hollywood division). Corey is one of Southern California’s best kickball kickers. With a soccer past and a few top-finishing kickball seasons under his belt, this guy can pound the ball and with his speed he is a constant home run threat to opposing teams. Most notably was his solo shot in the Hollywood/Studio Allstar Showdown. On the defensive side Corey brings a cannon-arm and bunt-stopping speed and accuracy to the shortstop position. The only drawback of the signing is Corey’s distance from the kickball field; he will likely have to miss a few games to his lengthy commute.

A similar player and free-agency pickup is the roster addition of CA Studio’s, The Rhino Stampede, Gianni Arone. Gianni is starting pitcher for the Stampede and will come in to perform a similar role for The Grassies. His wicked breaking ball is reminiscent of Hollywood’s John Barry (2-Time Cy Young winner of the division) and is nearly impossible to get a good bunt off of — this will be a key weapon against the bunt-led offenses of our divisional rivals the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers and the Chuck Norris Delta Force.

The final free-agency signing comes in the form of Sam Levassar, a championship-winning former captain of CA Studio’s Wonderballz team. Our scouting reports tell us that Sam is a utility infielder with an exceptional arm. His versatility will be key as he can play the important positions of Shortstop, Pitcher and 1st Base all very well and will be able to fill in any of those spots greatly. Sam is also an able bunter and kicker and can ad a definite spark to our offense. His previous experience and championship title will also add veteran wisdom to a team that has been close many times but never crossed the threshold.

On the rookie side we have some promising new additions in the form of WAKA newcomers, John Nixon, Kevin Linehan, Emily Popper and Chris Perkel. All four come from athletic backgrounds and look to have very promising careers in the field of nostalgia-based sporting.

John Nixon, aside from having a deep understanding of the game of baseball and the principles of manufacturing runs, also plays on The Grassy Best houseband, Spacemuseum. Nixon, provides the band’s backbeat with his exceptional drumming and will likely add that solid foundation and rhythm to the Grassy organization. His quickness and saavy will be key assets.

Kevin Linehan comes to us from our chief talent scout – his wife Kathlene. Kathlene, a former Grassy herself, is one of thequickest women to play the game but her true talent lies in recruiting. Her firm of Kiernan and Linehan Kickball Scouting Associates has been responsible for the acquisition of Grassy alltime runs-leader, Dave”The Cuddler” Lewis and former Dodgeball sensation Rob “Astroclyde” Clyde (a forec to be reckoned with in his one performance last season). Kathleen also provided two breakout finds for The Grassies’ farmteam, The Warner Pros but enough about Kathleen, we’re here to discuss her Husband Kevin. Kevin adds depth at the position of guy-named Kevin to the team since we will be losing two Kevins this season. But more importantly, he is a phenomenal softball talent and was a key standout at Wide Reciever in last year’s Poinsettia Turkey Bowl.

Rookie Emily Popper also has a softball background and comes highly recommended by OG and Bullpen Closer, John “The Commuter” LeBlanc.

Lastly will be Columbia graduate and former roommate to Quinn “The Professor” Saunders (AKA: Clemens, Kurt Gibson, The Bus, Colonel Saunders and Mighty Quinn), Chris Perkel. Perkel is a noted baseball scholar along the lines of fellow rookie John Nixon (but since both are Yankees fans, how scholarly can they be?!?!?) but his athletic prowess comes from his past experiences as a standout member of the Ultimate Frisbee community. Perkel is no stranger to silly games with unnecessarily high levels of competitiveness and thus will be unphased by the sheer douschitude of some of our Hollywood Kickballing opponents. Not to mention quickness and great hands, “The Perkelator” aims to be an exceptionally promising Grassy newcomer.

Lastly, and this is unconfirmed info mind you, there is a chance that OG Grassy and two-time All-Star, Kristle “The Pistle” Baillargeon MAY be coming out of retirement to join her fellow Grassies for another season of Kickball Mayhem. This could be HUGE as Kristle is an offensive force to be reckoned with considering her OBP is in the 90 percent range and her ball-placement is stellar. On defense she has great hands and has a keen sixth sense for covering bases and making plays. Cross your fingers for this one Grassies but don’t count on anything until the ink is dry on that contract extension.